In this guide: a packing checklist you can print, the Michigan paperwork to prepare, a step-by-step plan for move-in day, and a week-by-week look at the first month. You will also find what is normal, what is not, and who to call if something seems wrong.
You have made the decision. Now comes the part nobody warns you about: the packing, the paperwork, and the first few weeks, when every phone call from your parent can feel like a verdict.
This guide is meant to make that stretch more predictable. It covers what to pack for assisted living, how to prepare, how to handle move-in day, and what to expect in the first 30 days. Every home has its own rules, so use this as a starting point and ask the home you chose for its own list.
Still weighing homes? Start with our 20 questions to ask when touring an assisted living facility. Feeling guilty about the decision? Read The Guilt of Choosing Assisted Living first.
What to Pack for Assisted Living: The Complete Checklist
Before you buy or box anything, ask the home three questions. What is already in the room? How big is the room? What items are not allowed? Rooms differ, and so do rules. A short call can save you a second trip.
Pack less than you think you need. Small rooms fill up fast, and clutter is a fall risk.
Clothing and Shoes
- 7 to 10 outfits that mix and match. Comfort and ease matter more than style.
- Elastic waists, front buttons or zippers, and stretchy fabrics. These are easier when hands are stiff or balance is poor.
- Non-slip, closed-back shoes or slippers with good support. Backless slippers are a common cause of trips.
- Sweaters, cardigans or light jackets. Rooms and dining areas can feel cool.
- Pajamas, a robe, socks and underwear in extra quantity.
- A winter coat, hat, gloves and boots. Michigan weather will matter on outings and doctor visits.
- Labels on everything, with your parent’s name. Items can go missing in shared laundry. Ask how laundry is handled so you know what to label and what to expect.
Personal Care Items
- Toothbrush, toothpaste, denture cleaner and a denture case.
- Shampoo, soap, lotion, deodorant and a favorite scent or brand. Familiar smells can calm a new room.
- A spare pair of glasses, and hearing aids with extra batteries or a charger.
- An electric razor, hairbrush and any hair products.
- Incontinence supplies, if needed. Ask whether the home provides them or you do.
Medical Information and Medicines
Here is where families most often make a mistake. They empty the medicine cabinet into a bag and bring everything. Do not do that.
In a Michigan Home for the Aged, the home supervises medicines according to the resident’s service plan, according to the state licensing handbook. Ask the admissions team exactly how it works before move-in day. Then bring what they ask for, in the packaging they ask for.
What you can safely prepare:
- A current list of every medicine, with dose, time and the doctor who prescribed it. Include vitamins, supplements and over-the-counter drugs.
- A list of allergies, including food allergies.
- The names and phone numbers of every doctor, specialist and pharmacy.
- Mobility aids such as a cane, walker or wheelchair, with your parent’s name on each.
- Medical equipment such as a CPAP machine, with its charger and instructions.
Our medication management page explains how a home can handle this part.
Comfort Items and Familiar Things
A new room feels like a hotel until it starts to look like home. This is the part of packing that matters most for your parent’s mood.
- A favorite blanket, pillow or quilt.
- Framed family photos. Write names and relationships on the back, which also helps staff start conversations.
- A clock with a large display that shows the day and date.
- A familiar chair, if the room has space and the home allows it.
- A small memory box with letters, cards, a keepsake or a favorite book.
Furniture and Room Setup
Ask for the room measurements first. Then choose a few pieces, not a full set.
- A comfortable chair or recliner that is easy to stand up from.
- A small dresser, nightstand or bookshelf, if the room is not already furnished.
- Bright, stable lamps. Good lighting helps with vision and nighttime safety.
- Wall art and a bulletin board for cards and photos.
Keep walkways wide and clear. Rugs, cords and low tables are fall hazards. Our fall prevention guide for seniors has more detail.
Phone, TV and Technology
- A cell phone or tablet with large text, plus a charger. Program family numbers before move-in.
- Headphones, if your parent likes to listen to music or the TV.
- A TV only if the home allows personal sets. Ask about cable, Wi-Fi and device rules.
- A digital photo frame that cycles through family pictures. Family members can add new photos from afar.
Hobbies, Faith and Daily Interests
Pack what makes your parent feel like themselves. Think about books, a crossword book, cards, knitting, a harmonica, a Bible or prayer beads, and favorite music.
A routine they enjoy can help your parent settle. Look at our social and recreational activities and music therapy pages to see what a home like ours offers.
Money and Valuables
Bring a small amount of cash, if any, for things like a haircut or a vending machine. Leave jewelry, important papers, family heirlooms and large amounts of cash at home. Ask the home how it handles valuables and whether there is a lockable space in the room.
What to Leave at Home
Many assisted living homes restrict certain items for safety. Always check the home’s list. Common examples include:
- Space heaters, heating pads and electric blankets
- Candles, incense and anything with an open flame
- Hot plates, toasters and other cooking appliances
- Overloaded power strips and long extension cords
- Sharp tools and blade razors
- Unlabeled medicines or pills in loose bags
- Perishable food stored in the room
CONFIRM: Dream Estates move-in policies. Confirm with the client before publishing: (1) whether rooms come furnished and room dimensions, (2) restricted items, (3) laundry policy, (4) personal TV, Wi-Fi and phone rules, (5) valuables storage, (6) incontinence supplies, (7) medicine handling and packaging requirements. Replace general wording with Dream Estates specifics, or keep the ‘ask your home’ wording.
Documents and Paperwork to Have Ready in Michigan
Paperwork can slow a move more than packing does. Gather these early:
- Photo ID, Social Security card and Medicare card.
- Any Medicaid, supplemental insurance, Medicare Advantage or long-term care insurance cards and policy numbers.
- Veteran status paperwork, if your parent served. See our VA benefits guide.
- Power of attorney documents, including a patient advocate designation if one exists.
- Advance directives and any medical orders already in place, such as a do-not-resuscitate order.
- A list of emergency contacts.
A note about the patient advocate designation. In Michigan, it is also called a durable power of attorney for health care. It names a person to make health decisions if your parent cannot, and it takes two witnesses to sign, according to Blue Cross Blue Shield of Michigan’s advance directive guide. If your parent does not have one, an elder law attorney can explain the options. This is a legal and medical choice, so do not leave it for a crisis.
The Health Paperwork Michigan Homes Must See
Michigan licensing rules for Homes for the Aged set a few specifics. A licensed health care professional’s written statement must be completed within 90 days before admission, listing any treatments or medicines the home needs to oversee. Evidence of an initial tuberculosis screening done within 12 months before admission must also be on record. Both come from the state licensing handbook for Homes for the Aged. Ask your parent’s doctor early, since appointments can take weeks to schedule.
Read the Admission Agreement Carefully
The same handbook says the written admission agreement must cover services and fees, how fee changes are announced, transportation fees, admission and discharge policies, the refund policy, and resident rights. A 30-day written notice is required before discharge. Read all of it, ask questions, and ask for a copy. Our admission process page walks through the steps, and our resident rights page explains what every resident is entitled to.
CONFIRM: Rule check. Rule numbers (R 325.1922) and timeframes come from the LARA HFA Technical Assistance Handbook. Michigan has had proposed revisions to the Homes for the Aged rules in 2025. Confirm the current text on the LARA site before publishing the 90-day, 12-month and 30-day figures.
How to Prepare in the Weeks Before Move-In
- Three weeks out: Review the admission agreement and the home’s packing list. Schedule the doctor visit for the health statement and tuberculosis screening. Start gathering documents.
- Two weeks out: Measure the room and decide which furniture goes. Label clothing and equipment. Order anything missing.
- One week out: Pack in two batches: essentials for the first week, and everything else. Confirm medicine details with the home. Tell the home about your parent’s routines.
- The day before: Set up the room if the home allows it, so your parent walks into something familiar. Make the bed, hang photos and set the clock.
Write a One-Page "About Me" Sheet
This small document may be the most useful thing you bring. Include your parent’s preferred name, wake and sleep times, favorite foods and drinks, music, hobbies, worries, and what calms them when upset. Add a few life details, such as a career, grandchildren’s names or a favorite place.
Staff learn faster with this sheet. It also helps them start real conversations, which is where trust begins.
Move-In Day: A Step-by-Step Plan
- Choose a calm time of day. Ask the home which time works best. For some people with dementia, confusion is worse late in the day.
- Set up the room before your parent comes in, or have one family member do it while another spends time with them. Bed, photos and a favorite chair first.
- Keep the group small. A crowd can be overwhelming in a new place.
- Meet the care staff together. Hand over the “About Me” sheet and the medicine list. Ask who your parent’s main contact is.
- Share a meal. It shows your parent what daily life will be like and gives you a chance to see the dining room.
- Say goodbye plainly and warmly. Avoid a long, tearful farewell, and avoid slipping away without a word. If your parent has dementia, ask staff how they recommend handling the goodbye.
- Call the home later that day, not your parent. Staff can tell you how the evening went.
Expect to feel drained afterward. This day can be one of the hardest of the whole process, even when you are sure the move is right.
What to Expect in the First 30 Days of Assisted Living
There is no universal schedule. The Alzheimer Society of Canada notes that adjusting takes time and varies: some people settle in weeks, others in months (Alzheimer Society, After Moving Day). So use the stages below as a planning guide, not a promise.
The First 72 Hours
Your parent is meeting new faces, new sounds, a new bed and new routines, all at once. Sleep may be poor. Appetite may dip. Your parent may seem confused, quiet or upset.
- Let the care team lead on daily routines. They are learning your parent’s habits.
- Visit if the home allows it, but keep visits calm and short at first.
- Avoid making big decisions or promises such as “this is just for now” if that may not be true.
Under Michigan law, residents have the right to reasonable, regular visiting hours of at least eight hours a day, according to the state handbook.
Week 1: Getting to Know Each Other
Michigan rules require the home to document each new resident’s needs and build a service plan from them. The resident and the authorized representative must take part in developing it (LARA handbook). Ask when yours will be finalized, what it covers, and how to suggest changes.
- Learn the names of the aides and nurses who work with your parent most.
- Ask how meals, bathing and medicines are going.
- Share what you notice at home that staff may not know.
- Join an activity once, with your parent, so they have one friendly face in the room.
Weeks 2 and 3: Building a Routine
This is when routines start to take hold, but ups and downs are normal. A good morning can be followed by a hard evening. Look for trends across several days, not single events.
- Notice whether your parent is eating, sleeping and taking part in at least some activities.
- Encourage one or two regular activities. Routine reduces anxiety.
- Keep a notebook. Write down concerns and questions so you can raise them calmly with staff.
If your parent has dementia, late afternoon agitation may increase in a new setting. Our sundowning guide explains what can help.
Days 22 to 30: The One-Month Check-In
Ask for a meeting with the care team near the end of the first month. The Alzheimer Society recommends regular planning meetings between family and care providers so you stay informed and can work together on care.
Questions worth asking:
- How is my parent eating, sleeping, walking and taking part in activities?
- Have there been any falls, medicine changes or new health concerns?
- What does my parent enjoy? What seems hard?
- Does the service plan still match their needs? What should change?
- Which staff member should I call first, and when is the best time to reach them?
If your parent needs more help than expected, the answer may be a higher level of care. If memory loss is part of the picture, ask about memory care.
Common Reactions in the First Month and How to Respond
There is no universal schedule. The Alzheimer Society of Canada notes that adjusting takes time and varies: some people settle in weeks, others in months (Alzheimer Society, After Moving Day). So use the stages below as a planning guide, not a promise.
The First 72 Hours
Your parent is meeting new faces, new sounds, a new bed and new routines, all at once. Sleep may be poor. Appetite may dip. Your parent may seem confused, quiet or upset.
- Let the care team lead on daily routines. They are learning your parent’s habits.
- Visit if the home allows it, but keep visits calm and short at first.
- Avoid making big decisions or promises such as “this is just for now” if that may not be true.
Under Michigan law, residents have the right to reasonable, regular visiting hours of at least eight hours a day, according to the state handbook.
“I Want to Go Home”
This is one of the hardest sentences a family hears. Do not argue and do not make promises you cannot keep. Acknowledge the feeling: “I know you miss home. It’s a big change.” Then shift gently to something concrete, such as a visit, a meal or a favorite song.
Repeated requests, especially when paired with sadness or fear, are worth sharing with staff. They can adjust the routine and watch for patterns. If you are struggling with guilt, our guilt article addresses this directly.
Anger or Blame
Your parent may direct frustration at you, because you are the safest person to be upset with. It can sting. Try to hear the fear underneath. Stay calm, keep visits short if tension rises, and tell staff so they can help.
Withdrawal or Low Mood
Many people become quieter in a new place. If it lasts or comes with changes in eating, sleep or interest in everything, ask the care team and your parent’s doctor to look at it. Do not assume it is just adjustment.
Frequent Phone Calls
Some parents call many times a day at first. Ask staff what they notice. A set call time, such as after dinner, can bring comfort and structure.
Your Own Feelings
Relief, grief, guilt and worry can all show up at once. That is common. The Alzheimer Society tells families to expect mixed emotions and grief during this change, and to keep up their own support network. Our post on caregiver burnout warning signs may help you notice when you need a break.
How Often Should You Visit in the First Month?
There is no research-backed number for every family. Some people need daily contact at first. Others do better with a steady rhythm.
For residents with dementia, Family Caregiver Alliance suggests visiting frequently during the first two weeks, then tapering gradually. It also suggests that several short visits a week may work better than one long one (Family Caregiver Alliance). Its guidance also advises avoiding outings until a person has adjusted. That advice is written for dementia care, so ask the care team what fits your parent.
In real life, a few things help most: visit around a meal or activity, bring something to do together such as photos or a card game, and keep a regular schedule so your parent knows when to expect you.
Warning Signs That Something Is Wrong
Adjustment is normal. Neglect is not. Take it seriously if you see:
- Unexplained bruises, injuries or repeated falls.
- Fast weight loss, dehydration or poor hygiene.
- Medicine mistakes, or answers about medicines that do not add up.
- Staff who avoid your questions or do not return calls.
- Restricted visiting during the adjustment period. Family Caregiver Alliance calls this a red flag.
- A sudden change in mood, alertness or behavior.
What to Do
- Document what you see, with dates, photos where allowed, and names.
- Raise it first with the nurse, the administrator or the care team. Ask for a care conference.
- If you are not satisfied, contact the Michigan Long Term Care Ombudsman. It is free and confidential, and it serves residents and families in homes for the aged. Statewide hotline: 866-485-9393.
- To file a licensing complaint, use the LARA complaint process or call 866-856-0126. To report abuse, neglect or exploitation of an adult, call 855-444-3911.
- In an emergency, call 911.
A good home welcomes questions. If you feel dismissed, that is information too.
Common Mistakes Families Make
- Packing too much. A crowded room is harder to move through and clean.
- Bringing medicines without asking. The home needs to control what is given and when.
- Skipping labels. Items disappear in shared laundry more often than people expect.
- Leaving out the “About Me” sheet. Staff cannot guess your parent’s routines.
- Judging the move by the first week. Early days are often the hardest, but one rough day is not a verdict.
- Visiting too much or too little. Both can add stress. Ask what works for your parent.
- Waiting to speak up. Small concerns are easier to fix early.
How Dream Estates Supports New Residents and Families
At Dream Estates, we want families to feel informed from the first call. Our admission process explains each step. If you are not ready for a long-term move, a short respite stay lets your parent try the home first, and adult day care offers daytime support while your parent sleeps at home.
Our FAQ page answers common questions, and you can ask us anything about move-in at the number below. If cost is a concern, see our Michigan cost guide and Medicaid guide.
CONFIRM: Dream Estates specifics. Add only what the client confirms: who helps on move-in day, when the service plan is written, when the first care conference happens, visiting hours, and how new residents are introduced to others. Do not state any of these unless confirmed.
Questions about moving a parent in? Call 1 (855) DREAM 00 | Contact us
Questions Families Often Ask
Make the First Month Easier
The first 30 days will not be perfect. But with the right preparation, the right questions and a team that welcomes your input, they can be steady and even hopeful. You are not giving up care. You are sharing it.
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